This is one of the more useful of these quizzes I deem meme. When I was a babe I was always stumbling out of airlocks. It’s handy to know exactly how long I could survive were it to happen again, even if I didn’t have that “can breathe in space” power I’ve come to love.

Be aware that as you take this test, you’re not only testing your knowledge as an expert on the world’s robots, but also increasing the suspicion that you are a robot yourself. Everyone knows that robots are familiar with each other. If you see anyone with a percentage higher than mine (I am obviously not a robot), be on the lookout for other potential evidence that supports them being a robot, such as denying the existence of robots, or the consumption of old people’s medicine. Also, if you’re afraid of robot attack, I recommend Old Glory Robot Insurance.

Nothing says, “Hey everyone, I’m in the mood for social suicide,” like blatantly admitting you even know what a programming language is, let alone how many different languages you can visually identify. Even in today’s technically progressive world, the nerd is still a bit of a social outcast, having only recently climbed out of the “I don’t know what girls look like” pit and into the “circle circle dot dot” one. By my calculations, that puts us just above 4th graders, and likely in today’s sexually progressive world, behind a large portion of them. To draw your attention away from my this blight on my person, I direct your attention to these people. Not to trample on anyone’s hobbies or dreams, but holy crap, we need limits people.

Though this is handy to know, I’m not sure how accurate this test is, as I recently tried trapping myself in my apartment for 6 hours and nearly died. I think I might need to replace my A/C filter; I kinda thought the “Poisonous Shroud” brand might be a bit more than just an appealing name.

In case any of my ministerially-minded friends are considering a life of ministry to the Korowai tribe, I thought I’d include this one. I’m going to assume that the test is somehow aware of my lean build and took into account that they would likely turn me into strips of beef jerky. Hence the high-seeming number I could feed. I tell you, these quizzes are getting smarter every day.

I’m going to take the rant path with this one and say that I dearly hope that God’s power is not limited to clicking a mouse at an extremely high rate of speed. I would have preferred something like “Dear God, someone call an ambulance” or “This person is in need of divine intervention, or he will die due to heart palpitations and brain explosion.” That way you can bring God into it and more accurately classify a person with as much coffee in them as I often have.

The only reason I’m including this one is that expressing my actual opinion would be far too vulgar for the clean world wide web that we all live in and enjoy. I loathe myspace more than I can express with words. Some suggested reading, in case you desire more insight: The Psychology of Hate by Robert Sternberg (Ed.), Hatred: The Psychological Descent into Violence by Willard Gaylin, Why We Hate by Jack Levin, and I Hate The Sydney Roosters by Nick Politis. I will also take this time to once again recommend all my fellow Firefox users out there the best plugin yet made: Am I On Myspace? You’re welcome.

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I was already aware that I can kick some serious ass, this test just confirms it. I could probably take out an entire classroom at just about any elementary school around. This is likely the most relevant quiz of all that I’ve listed here, as you never know when you’ll either need to reprimand a large group of 5 year olds (by kicking the sweet living crap out of them), or when a large 5 year old zombie uprising might occur. Be ready my friends. Be ready.